DownSyn Forum

ElisMom · Posted: April 16 2009, 9:01 PM Post subject: How long do kids "wander off" ???

My Eli turned 4 in January and he still makes a B-line for the road when we're playing outside. We live on a road where people drive anywhere from 55-70 mph...very scary. I got an estimate for a fence to go around a portion of our backyard...$5,600! I'm eating large amounts of chocolate just thinking about it! I'm just wondering if this taking off for the road thing is something he will grow out of soon or if we have several more years of this to look forward to. Obviously safety is my number one concern but I don't want to spend all of this money if by next summer he is no longer doing this. Does anyone with older kids have any advice for me? I know all kids are different but I would appreciate any input anyone has. Thanks!

Karen

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Karen
Mom to Wyatt 5, Eli 3(DS), Abel 2, Weston 2 mo.

iluvmacy · Posted: April 16 2009, 11:33 PM Post subject:

Macy is just turning 4 but she does this ALL the time. She doesn't listen..and thinks it's funny. parking lots, stores, everywhere she will just dart off whereever. I hope there's an end in site as well!!

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Alyssa- mommy to Macy (ds) 5/11/05 and Dallas 3/16/07

"Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle." Author Unknown

SherryinWI · Posted: April 17 2009, 7:51 AM Post subject:

I think the question cannot be answered. I do hope it is just a stage for your little guy. It seams to me that some of our kids have that "wandering gene" with that flight or fight response and others do not. Nate so far has not had this, yet. I add yet because I cannot honestly say he will never have this. It is something I am very conscious of and keep a closer eye on him than I did with my other two kids. Yet, I have given him lot of freedom to sort of test this too! At his siblings school it is surrounded by a very rural area and I can let him wonder a bit from the play set to the tennis courts to the garden and still keep an eye on him. I tend to put him in bright colors to keep better visual eye of him and not smother him. He likes people so he tends to be by others. I have only let him out by himself on the play set when I am washing dishes and watching him out the window. He stays in
the area pretty well, which is surprising because we have woods in the back too. We have no fencing.

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Sherry
Evan 12, Olivia 11, and Nate 8*

Hosted on Fotki

ElisMom · Posted: April 17 2009, 9:26 AM Post subject:

Thank you for your replies. I think I am gonna bite the bullet and have the fence put in. We already keep such a close eye on him because of this but you can literally turn away for like 10 seconds and he's almost to the road...and it only takes one time to end tragically. This will be our 3rd summer of "chasing" and I just want him to be able to go out and play safely. Why does fence have to be so expensive!!!

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Karen
Mom to Wyatt 5, Eli 3(DS), Abel 2, Weston 2 mo.

SherryinWI · Posted: April 17 2009, 11:03 AM Post subject:

Check with your local agencies. I know here via family support there is money for short term needs and even if they are on the waiting list for long term care needs you can get funding for short term issues such as saftey. Some have even had swing sets covered (don't know the specific need they put to get this). I know others have recieved some money for fencing or house/door alarms. Contact your local Down syndrome support group and ask around other moms in your area. It seams like some funding is out there but to find it can be tricky.

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Sherry
Evan 12, Olivia 11, and Nate 8*

Hosted on Fotki

ElisMom · Posted: April 18 2009, 9:17 PM Post subject:

Thanks for the suggestion, Sherry. I would never have thought of that. I called the school that Eli used to have a play group at and they are looking into it for me. I couldn't imagine actually getting help to pay for it, that would be amazing!

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Karen
Mom to Wyatt 5, Eli 3(DS), Abel 2, Weston 2 mo.

Grady's Mommy · Posted: April 19 2009, 11:56 AM Post subject:

Grady will be 5 next month and he's still a runner. He doesn't necessarily bolt for the road at home. But he does run away from us and we have to chase him down, grab his hand, and make him walk hand in hand to where we are going (swingset etc.).

I don't go ANYWHERE without holding his hand (I still put him in a stroller at big places like the mall). It's frustrating because I'm able to trust his 2.5 year old sister more than him.

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~Kathy
Grady (DS 5/26/04)
Hailey 9/20/06
Evan 7/27/10

lesterbell · Posted: May 01 2009, 4:31 PM Post subject:

My Kayla (DS) will be 7 in July and she still runs in parking lots, but she remembers that I have taught her to look both ways, but she ends up swinging her head side to side so fast, I think all she sees is a blur.

I think every kid is different, but I know someone who's dog ran away and the boy was about 8 or 9 at the time and he chased the dog all the way to the highway and was running in the highway trying to get the dog! Shocked

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Mom to Kayla (DS, Polyarticular Arthritis 7/11/2002)

ecki · Posted: May 02 2009, 6:09 PM Post subject:

I know several families who have gotten funding for fencing, so it's definitely something you should look in to. Where are you located? Maybe someone can point you towards some specific resources. I believe the ARC may have funding for that since it is a serious safety issue.

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Ecki

MomMom of Kayla (Ds/Autism 4/5/04) and Laurie (PDD-NOS 7/12/01)

Our Blog - Opposite Kids
Kayla's Story http://www.ecki.com/kayla/

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raysmom · Posted: September 03 2009, 10:52 PM Post subject: escape artist

Last Sunday a passing motorist frantically rang our doorbell to report that there was a little boy sitting on our porch roof with his blankie. AAGGGHHH! The little bugger figured out how to open the bedroom window screen and just crawled out onto the roof. He's 5. We've had a fence since day 1 and double-keyed deadbolts (key for inside and out) on the main doors. We've lost him on vacation, at church, you name it.

LovelyKennedy · Posted: September 06 2009, 9:17 AM Post subject:

We have a runner...still and she will be 6 this week......I hope it ends soon..it is very very frustrating. We recently just received funding for a fenced in backyard and it os wonderful. We also received funding for a pool alarm and door/window alarms. We received them yesterday and are installing them today. Kennedy got out last month after somebody here forgotto deadbolt the front door....we found her across the street and around the corner on a neighbors swingset.....good grief. I was sick to my stomach just thinking about it. Hopefully we will be in better shape with door/wondow alarms. Good luck!

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Beth Mom to Cameron 2/26/2000, Kendall 6/25/2002 and My Lovely Kennedy 9/10/2003(DS)

ElisMom · Posted: September 06 2009, 1:45 PM Post subject:

Oh my goodness...if they had any idea how much they scare us to death!!!

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Karen
Mom to Wyatt 5, Eli 3(DS), Abel 2, Weston 2 mo.

CassiesMom · Posted: September 07 2009, 11:28 AM Post subject:

Cassie had that same problem too, and it didn't honestly stop until last year. We ended up getting a fence, and it was the best purchase ever. I cannot even begin to tell you how much stress that relieves. And yes, check with your county services. We found out after we put it in that we'd qualify for half the cost of the fence.

Quote:

Last Sunday a passing motorist frantically rang our doorbell to report that there was a little boy sitting on our porch roof with his blankie.

Oh, wow! What a fright that must have been! No kidding, Karen - if only they knew how much we worry about that stuff.

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Susan
Mom to Cassie
(11/10/98 DS, Partial Complex Seizures, Celiac Disease)

Amy Jensen · Posted: December 27 2009, 9:56 AM Post subject: I feel your pain!

Hi all,
Haven't been here in a LONG time, but this 5 plus category is terrific. Jane is 8 1/2 and is an escape artist. We have a fence that surrounds the entire backyard, deadbolts on the doors, lock on her room, etc. She STILL manages to escape once in a while, although the fence is a neccessity in my opinion. She has been doing this for a long time and the frustrating part is we have no idea when it will end. She is impulsive. Are your kids? I mean, one minute she could be sitting nicely watching TV and the next she could be out the front door, running down the street or in my bathroom dumping out pills. Now this does happen less frequently now that she's older, but it still happens and usually just when we think she's over it. It is very frustrating and anxiety provoking. My only advice from a mom who's right there with you is to safety proof what you can and hope and pray that our kids grow out of this!

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Amy
Mom to Gigi(15), Charlie(12) and Janie(11-Ds), and Pia( 7)

McKenna · Posted: December 30 2009, 5:00 PM Post subject:

Darah has never been a bolter or a runner, but is definitely a wanderer...which is scary because it's passive. She is almost 5 1/2 and I think we are a ways from her not wandering off....

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happymom · Posted: December 30 2009, 9:18 PM Post subject:

Netanel does the same. I think he has gotten better about the street, but he will unlock the door & go to the neighbors. But it really is the same as some of my other kids. The bigger problem is at stores or walking outside.He just wants to see things, & of course touch.

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Married ,Mommy to 8
girl 26 married with dd,boy & baby boy 1/17/11, boy25 married with, boy, & baby boy 4/6/11, boy 22, girl 20 maried 5/3/11,girl 17, boy 14, boy 12, Netanel 6 with DS

pmjc48 · Posted: December 31 2009, 4:25 AM Post subject:

Nicky is 22 and would still wonder off he got the chance (this a young man who is a wheelchair user when we go out anywhere) Wink

). We have a six foot fence enclosing our garden and a six foot gate which is always locked and I would not let him outside if we didn't have it. I must admit though that he will now follow me round the supermarket and not run off to where he knew the toy department was so shopping with him is a bit easier Very Happy

.

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Mum of Nicky 25, and Connor14 who is severely autistic, and five older siblings