DownSyn Forum

csunshinegirl

what would you differently? OR are you glad you did?

I have an almost three year old. Just wondering what are the issues that are up ahead and wanting to be proactive. I know every child is different, but just wondering what you would do differently or the same.

Thank you.

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Christine
Mom to Olivia 03/19/2009

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Grady's Mommy · Posted: December 18 2011, 7:01 PM Post subject:

I think I would have pushed him harder, lol. Grady was my first so I didn't know what a typical child should be doing at certain ages. So I kept letting things go thinking "oh, we'll work on that later" etc. etc.

Well, here we are now at at 7 and there are some things I'm embarrassed that he can't do. 1) Drink from an open cup. He can do it, but it's very messy and he doesn't get a lot down. Everything in me says my 7yo should not be using a sippy cup still. I should have worked on that skill earlier and stopped worrying about the mess he'd made.

OT is his weakest area. And I can't help but feel like I should have just pushed harder, earlier.

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~Kathy
Grady (DS 5/26/04)
Hailey 9/20/06
Evan 7/27/10

seansmom · Posted: December 18 2011, 8:35 PM Post subject:

I wish I had been more consistent with discipline and rules etc. Just like Grady's mom I kept thinking we would work on it later or that he wasn't ready yet. I would have pushed him more too but he's my second child and you tend to be more easier going with the second. I wish he had been my first. My daughter had more play time with me.

I also wish I had discovered this site back then. There's a wealth of information here. I was living in a small city where there weren't any support groups or other parents to compare notes with.

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Kellie Mom to Sean 10 yrs with DS and Carly 14 yrs

Catty · Posted: January 09 2012, 10:22 AM Post subject:

I wish we had set the ground rules from Day 1. She was quite ill at the beginning and we always catered to her out of guilt,and now she has us wrapped around her finger. Part of her issues are from her stubborn personality, but the rest i think is habit.

mary c · Posted: January 09 2012, 12:57 PM Post subject:

The one thing that I think did work was to keep her in a mainstream educational environment as much as possible. We put Anna in a regular preschool with support right from the beginning and expected her to keep up. We are now in 2nd grade and she is in a regular classroom for most of the days. She has typical friends, goes to religion class, and is the Brownies with her typical peers. She doesn't always act or do the same things as her typical peers but she has learned a lot from them about how to behave. I would keep your expectations of your child high and you may be surprised how they will meet them. (to this day, Anna is the only one of my kids who consistently picks up her dishes after a meal and loads the dishwasher--and my other kids are in their late teens!). I would also take your child everywhere with you--the grocery store, the post office, restaurants, library ,etc. rather than leaving her home for convenience sake. Your child will learn a lot about how to behave just by being exposed to lots of different circumstances.

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Mary
Mom to Libby 6/92, Alex 9/93, Anna (DS)12/12/03

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LinMac · Posted: January 09 2012, 2:09 PM Post subject:

I wish inside myself I had a much longer window of expectation for Robert's ability to master a new skill whether that be talking, walking, potty training, main stream schooling,etc.
By that I mean I worried way to much when he didn't do mainly what his peer with DS were doing.
Over time I've come to realise that he was doing those things, the only difference is he is doing them at his pace!
And really it doesn't matter if he's not doing it today....what matter is we are seeing progress over time.

I wish I could have suspended all the milestones, all the if onlys, all the watching and said to myself I'll compare Robert to other kids when he's say 10 years old. (Maybe I should aim to stop comparing!!! LOL!)
I think at that stage I'll be pleasently surprise at where is at, and what he can do!!!

I wish I had one of those time elapsed cameras....you know the ones that show a house being constructed in 5 minutes, instead of a house I wish we had Robert on the screen! LOL!

My niece who also has DS turned 10 this christmas. I couldn't get over how like a regular 10 year old she is now!

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Linda & John
mom to Hannah Kate (Age 14 ), Robert (Aged 8 - DS)

First day at school

Solveig · Posted: January 09 2012, 3:05 PM Post subject:

I would have cried less, worried less and spent even more time just hugging her Wink

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Mom to:
Jesper 07/23/95 (stepson)
Hanne Torill 06/06/98 (daughter)
Benedikte 04/14/00 DS (daughter)
Mads & Emil 07/05/00 (stepsons)
Svein Atle 05/13/03 (son)

LinMac · Posted: January 09 2012, 3:39 PM Post subject:

Solveig said

Quote:

I would have cried less, worried less and spent even more time just hugging her

I love your relpy......You said it so much better than me!

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Linda & John
mom to Hannah Kate (Age 14 ), Robert (Aged 8 - DS)

First day at school

Amy · Posted: January 09 2012, 9:05 PM Post subject:

Solveig wrote:

I would have cried less, worried less and spent even more time just hugging her Wink

Yes. I agree!

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Keep the Faith, Amy
Mom to Kristin (26) Jessica (24) Rebecca (21) Rachel (16) Sarah (14) Hunter (11) & Austin (7) DS

Tigger · Posted: January 13 2012, 9:29 PM Post subject:

If I had known what I know now when Talitha was born I would have thrown a huge party celebrating the changes that would come into our lives including amazing miracles and lots of incredible people as well as having an awesomely beautiful little girl Very Happy

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Karyn
Mum to Nikki (Jul 89), Stefanie (Sep 96), Joel [June 98] and Talitha (DS) (Nov 05) AVSD/PDA repaired 23 March 06

"I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Marvelous are Your works, and that my soul knows very well." Psalm 139:14

Leanna · Posted: February 01 2012, 5:05 PM Post subject:

We decided to 'take our time' anyway. He was sick and needed so much!
I agree about the hugs! Ty is my hero!

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Ann
mom to Ty Christian 6 yrs (Ds, autism and neuromuscular scoliosis)
adoption date 11/3/08 WOOHOO!

ajbest · Posted: February 07 2012, 11:04 AM Post subject:

i totally agree with Tigger!!! Laughing

only thing that comes to mind is teeth brushing - wish i'd never slacked up on putting those baby tooth things in her mouth all along as she was growing. we SURVIVED the thrashing and NOT wanting to brush for awhile but i think if we'd have kept at it all along from itty bitty on up it would not have been as tough. we finally made it to an upright position w/o any fights and she have been LOVING teeth brushing/dentist ever since Smile

we kept exposing J to all the things that she was unsure about - certain noises, loud noises, textures, foods, etc. with lots of love and reassurance and eventually she was okay with her world.

we are glad we left her in the nursery at church, let her cry at pre-school, etc. it only lasted minutes compared to where she is socially today. she's way more out-going/social than both of us Embarassed

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Momma to Janna Macie (CAVCanal/Mitral Valve Repair-T21-02/02/05)
Wife to Joseph (TOF & still thriving)

"Where there is charity and wisdom, there is neither fear nor ignorance." St. Francis of Assisi

"God has not always answered my prayers. If He had, I would have married the wrong man several times." Ruth Bell Graham

tatorsmom95

I think the only thing I would change is being more involved with my son's speech therapies. I just thought they knew what was best for him, but years later I discovered they really didn't. There were several things that they never worked with him on and I wish I would've known it then because I think it would have helped his muscle tone and word pronunciation better. So I would recommend reading up on this area and stay as involved as possible. Regardless I would not change my son for whom he has become, he is the BEST thing that has ever happened to me and has taught me sooo much. Good luck with your little one and enjoy him or her .
There is one other thing, I would have had my son mainstreamed from the get go instead of having him in a special ed school, I didn't actually realize that a mainstream school was a better option for him until he was in the seventh grade. Since he has been mainstreamed he has blossomed so much with reading, writing . I know that this all depends on the child but if this is an option I would highly recommend it as well.

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Amber

briarsmom · Posted: February 24 2012, 8:34 PM Post subject:

good question, besides no junk food there are not many things I would change!
Things that I would change were out of my control.

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Lori
Wife to Wes (briarsdad)
Mom to Will(11)9-14-98 Briar(8)DS 6-22-01