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morning routine


 
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seansmom
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PostPosted: November 22 2010, 12:04 PM    Post subject:
morning routine
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What a morning! This was how it looked

We got up at 7:00. While I was still opening my eyes Sean had taken a butter knife and proceeded to go downstairs and open a bedroom door downstairs where my husband used to hide the keys to the furnace room. He got up on his toy car and took everything down from the closet shelf including some stuff my husband had that is up there for a reason. Sean is obsessed with going into the furnace room to steal my husband's big flashlight even though he has about 5 of his own. I come downstairs and get him out of there, put on the tv and go back upstairs after setting Sean's timed timer and reminding him he has to go to school this morning. I make lunches, bring Sean his breakfast, get dressed and yay,Sean is coming up the stairs so I bring him into the kitchen to get changed. He fights taking his pj's off and putting on his clothes. He's dropped and flopped twice and hit me 3 times and pulled my hair. Then we get into the laundry room where I have to fight to get him into his coat and boots while trying to make sure my daughter is right behind us. Then I get to the truck and have to wrestle him into his seat as he is wanting to climb into the back of the SUV. We drop off my daughter at one door of the school and I drive over to the other one which is way across a field. It is -31 with the windchill. I go around the truck to get Sean out and he has taken his boots off. So there I am with my butt hanging out the truck, the wind blowing and my fingers freezing off while I get his boots on. Then I have to wrestle him into a hat, scarf and gloves. He refused to put on snowpants so I am praying he doesn't fall in the snow. So off we go and he walks like a turtle all the way to the door. We are now 15 minutes late, I am freezing to death and ready to kill him. So needless to say I handed him to his aide and said "he's yours" and took off. I was so mad!

Does any of this sound familiar to you? When does the fighting end? I don't get why he fights so much when he knows the routine and actually likes going to school. It makes me crazy!!

Whew! I guess I just needed to vent!

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Edensmama
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PostPosted: November 22 2010, 12:58 PM    Post subject:
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OK, so I have no advice. But I just had to say....-31?!?!?! holy cr*@!!!

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Nathalie
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LinMac
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PostPosted: November 22 2010, 1:20 PM    Post subject:
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Having similar issues here. This is Roberts second year in school. Last year he was fine.....you could be describing me but instead of snow we have driving rain!

Can't wait to see the replies!

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lespring
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PostPosted: November 22 2010, 2:26 PM    Post subject:
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VERY familiar, and I promise it does end eventually. The hard part is figuring out the "when" part.

Angela has gone through phases with her morning routine. One thing I discovered was I wasn't allowing enough time. If she sensed AT ALL that I was trying to rush her, she slowed down, or just plain stalled out completely!
Also, as much as she can do by herself, the better. If she could put her own pants on, then letting her do so made things go much smoother, BUT, I had to allow enough time for her to do that.

So, while you were making lunches, maybe he could have been in the kitchen with you putting on his pants? (or something else if he's able to do it independently.) With Angela, I just put her pants on the floor, said "Oh look, pants! Put your pants on. All by yourself!" and would walk away. If I stayed, the whole flopping fish thing happened. If I walked away, she'd struggle through getting her pants on, then come running around a corner to show me what she did, all proud and excited for herself! At which point we'd have a huge party about her doing it herself.

Shirts she needed more help with for a long time. Socks were pretty tricky for her too.

By the time she was about 9 or 10, she was independently getting ready for school. It DID take a lot of thought, and always thinking 3 steps ahead of her. I was able to say to her, "I will put your clothes here. In the morning when you get up, you can get dressed all by yourself." Sometimes that meant she'd wake up at 3:00 a.m and be getting dressed through. It's not a perfect system. LOL

I know last year, mornings were still tricky about 50% of the time. She could be chugging along just great, but if I ticked her off in anyway, forget it! Trying to think ahead of her all the time was exhausting, but necessary for my sanity. She does better if she knows the night before what is happening tomorrow. (obsessed with this, really.) So if I was making changes to the routine, I'd say something the night before. This helped a lot with her compliance. And when she went to bed at night she could be heard talking to herself, repeating the instructions for the next day.

This year (ahem, at 14!) the mornings are a breeze! We've only had 2 or 3 bad ones since school started, and she's gotten her period within 24 hours so now I know! But really, she's pretty easy now. I haven't had to chase for a couple of years now. And man, do I remember complaining to my friend about chasing, and she would remind me about all the teens and young adults we know who no longer require chasing. I tried to remember that as I chased Angela through a store, or dodged flying objects, etc.

Hang in there. It DOES end eventually!

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~Leah~

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And don't forget to visit MINE!
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mom to Rob 26, Noah 25, Tyler 23, Bryon 23, Angela 16 (DS), Axel 12 (DS, adopted from Serbia 12/2012, AAI w/fusion) Asher 7 (DS adopted from Serbia 12/2011, AAI non-fusion)
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seansmom
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PostPosted: November 22 2010, 6:20 PM    Post subject:
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Lol. Yes it is cold here. We are having an unusual November. Last year it didn't snow until December. It will warm up to -2 on Saturday thank God! This is even making this northern girl whine!

Thanks for the advice lespring. I will try out some of those strategies. I have a morning routine visual that I am going to start using and start locking the downstairs door until he is dressed.

It seems like the days that he's a nightmare for me he's good at school. . It's like he's thinking "well I made Mom's life difficult this morning, I think I will be an angel for the folks at school". Grrrr

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Excalibur
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PostPosted: November 22 2010, 8:44 PM    Post subject:
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Ha ha ha ! sounds familiar.
Its the angelic hug you get after this kind of delinquency and driving you
to the wall and beyond that really puts the cherry on the cake, isnt it?

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DsStepmom
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PostPosted: November 22 2010, 9:10 PM    Post subject:
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Yes it sounds familiar! BF and I say at least once a day - It would be so much easier if he didn't fight everything!! It's not a new routine, in fact we are very careful to make sure it is the same routine every morning yet it's still a fight!!

-31, thank god it's not that cold in Ontario yet!!

Hang in there - it must get better at some point!!

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Momtoseven
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PostPosted: November 22 2010, 10:29 PM    Post subject:
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Sorry no advice here, but -31 holy @#$% is right. I guess I won't complain the next time the temp dips below 50 here.

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Tigger
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PostPosted: November 22 2010, 11:47 PM    Post subject:
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Oh my goodness!!!!!! You can hear me whining 100 miles away when it is minus 5 (celsius) here and that usually only means a heavy frost - it's too dry to snow here often. I don't think I would cope with -31!!

Talitha loves preschool and yet we have mornings when nothing works. I help her dress and minutes or seconds later she is undressed, or we get to school and find that she threw her shoes out the car window just outside our front gate and we have to go home to get them. It is a rare day that she still has shoes and socks on when we get to the school and I have to put her lunch box out of reach otherwise she breaks into it and starts on her lunch.

Some mornings she eats breakfast like an angel, others she puts food everywhere and runs off outside while I am trying to get organised.

We sometimes have a fight to get into the car, other mornings she is out there banging on the door wanting help to open it.

Some mornings she lets me do her hair, others she insists on brushing it (for ages and ages) before she will let me near her.

When we get her to school she sometimes runs to the door which often results in a fall because the ground is uneven, or she ambles distractedly (usually when I am in a hurry) but if I try to hurry her or pick her up she throws herself on the ground and it takes even longer.....so you are not alone.

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Mum to Nikki (Jul 89), Stefanie (Sep 96), Joel [June 98] and Talitha (DS) (Nov 05) AVSD/PDA repaired 23 March 06

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Emdad
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PostPosted: November 23 2010, 10:30 AM    Post subject:
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Except for the temperature Razz , sounds like a typical morning at our house. I'm gonna hold Leah to that promise, LOL.
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seansmom
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PostPosted: November 24 2010, 8:37 PM    Post subject:
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So today Sean was a perfect angel. First he slept through the whole night in his own bed (something he's only done about 7 times in 4 years). Then he got dressed without a fight. He got into the truck without a fight and walked into the school like a perfect angel.

If only we could read their minds to see what worked. That's ok though, I'll take these perfect days any time.

Oh and by the way we were -36 with the windchill yesterday morning. We were the third coldest place on earth. Only Calgary (3 hours south of here) and the north and south poles were colder. LOL. The rest of the winter will be a breeze now! We're supposed to warm up to 0 tomorrow. Now we'll all get sick! lol

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LinMac
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PostPosted: November 25 2010, 4:29 AM    Post subject:
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Do you think Sean might have loged onto the forum and read this post! LOL!
Only explanation I can think of for the perfect behaviour!
See he can do it!

Delighted you had a good morning!

Its below 0 here....thats very unusual for November....gurrrrr!

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lespring
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PostPosted: November 25 2010, 10:24 AM    Post subject:
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The coolest part is what Lynda said, "See? He can do it!"

She is so right! You know he's CAPABLE of having a good morning and getting through the morning smoothly. Maybe Sean knew you needed a little taste of the future to give you the strength to press on.

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~Leah~

My mom's blog
http://gardenofeagan.blogspot.com/

And don't forget to visit MINE!
http://itsmylifemom.blogspot.com/

mom to Rob 26, Noah 25, Tyler 23, Bryon 23, Angela 16 (DS), Axel 12 (DS, adopted from Serbia 12/2012, AAI w/fusion) Asher 7 (DS adopted from Serbia 12/2011, AAI non-fusion)
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