Hello everyone!

My name is Melissa and I'm currently 16 weeks pregnant. After an abnormal NT scan at 12 weeks, we decided to have a CVS test and we found that our baby boy has Down syndrome.

My reaction was total shock (yes, even at 42 years of age!) and grief for my "lost" baby and a lot of fear, worrying about if this baby boy will even be born And if he is born, fear that I won't have what it takes to take care of a special needs baby--especially since I have no idea how "needy" his needs will be.

I was so afraid that we would go to the level 2 u/s and find that his heart was missing an aorta, or something really important and not fixable. At our 16 week u/s we found that baby boy is doing quite well. His growth is keeping right up with where he should be. So far, the doc can't find any heart issues. He did see a white mark that I believe he said is a calcium deposit , which is a marker for Ds, but doesn't harm anything. His neck is still thick, which sort of bothers me, I've heard its supposed to go away.

Other then that, he's looking quite normal and healthy. Of course I know its very early and a lot of things can come up, but I've decided to be guardedly optimistic, living one day at a time--or maybe two weeks at a time, the amount of time between u/s visits. For the first time since we got the diagnosis, I was actually looking forward to this baby coming into the world and stopped worrying that he wouldn't make it.

I've been browsing this site for a few weeks now and found some comfort and reassurance reading the responses to other newbies . . It's so nice to not be alone and to know that eventually life will go on and we can find happiness again. Of course my head is still spinning regarding all of the information--all the different medical issues, and how to make sure he gets the medical attention and early intervention needed for him to reach his full potential. . .I guess this will take time. . .

I'm so glad a fellow mom pointed me to this site and look forward to posting!!

I also wanted to add that we also have a 12mo girl, Clara and I have a 21 yo daughter, Katrina.

_________________
Melissa & Tim. Parents to Katrina (9/86) Clara (12/06) and baby boy, Ds (edd 6/1/2008)

Congrats and welcome to the site.

My advise would be to relax and enjoy the pregnancy. There are lots of health issues that come with DS but remember this "your little boy will not have every health issue attributed to DS". Get ready for the best ride of your life, this boy will rock your world.

Again, Congrats and welcome.

_________________

Welcome Melissa and welcome to the downsyn site.

I am glad you found us for this place has been a saving grace for me. We found out about our daughters diagnosis the day after she was born, although, DH and I noticed features the day of. Our little girl is a beautiful, fun loving, silly, and all-around the best thing ever. We have been very fortunate to be healthy and free of surgeries.

You will hear from many that it will take time to heal, to accept, to come to terms, and to look forward. For me, it has taken a long time and I sought help in dealing with my emotions. But I wouldn't pass it up for the world. I am very happy you have introduced yourself and your family. Please feel free to ask questions, comment, laugh and cry with us. We are here for you, for someone if not many of us have been there and done that.

Many hugs to you and congratulations on your new baby boy. My thoughts and prayers are with you as you continue through this pregnancy.

HUGS and welcome!

_________________
Eli
"Hugs and a Lick"
Mom to Abby (DS 10/21/03), James Thomas (01/31/06)

congratulations melissa and welcome.... sit back, relax and enjoy your pregnancy... dont let too many fears get to you right now tho i guess that may be easier said than done! i hope you have an lovely easy pregnancy and a quick and painless birth when the time comes... anything you want to know, there is always someone on here to have the answers
Dxx

_________________
mum to Nathan 10 + Mackenzie 9mths (DS)

Thanks everyone!

Enjoying my pregnancy has definitely been moved to the top of my list of priorities. I felt really robbed finding out so early and grieving and worrying about him.

Of course I know all the "reassuring" u/s in the world can't guarantee everything will turn out OK, but I'm not going to dwell on that anymore.

I'm so excited to be having a baby boy after having two girls!

_________________
Melissa & Tim. Parents to Katrina (9/86) Clara (12/06) and baby boy, Ds (edd 6/1/2008)

Welcome to the site and congrats! This site will so help you and your family. We didnt find out Alexis has DS until after she was born. Enjoy your pregnancy! I look forward to reading more about your pregnancy and getting to know you and your family

_________________
Kelly Rimmer
Mom to
Paige-11-12-92
Aaron-06-16-99(Adhd and Dyslexia)
08-19-05 (DS)
Kristen-11-1-2006
Baby #5 due 3-18-08


Helen Keller once said,
"Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired, and success achieved".


www.discoverytoyslink.com/kellystoybox
www.firstgiving.com/AlexisRimmer

Hey! Yeah...I was 42 when Austin was born, refused all prenatal testing so my big shock was 4 hours after his birth. And you are right. There is a grieving process, but you will come out of it and it seems you already are. You'll find baby boy to be kinda sleepy at first, so don't think the worst. I found I had to completely forget timetables for milestones and just rest assured that he'll meet those milestones. Austin did have a major heart repair and we all survived that too. He's a healthy, curious, rambunctious 3 year old. He goes to preschool with in two little schools, 1 a typical school of 2 year olds, the other class a special needs preschool with 3 and 4 year olds. He's adored by everyone who meets him. He is a joy.
I'm glad you found us. I"m looking forward to hearing more about baby boy when he gets here!! Welcome to the family.
Keep the Faith.
amy

_________________

Mom to seven beautiful children...including Mr...I didn't make that mess....
(aka Austin - 05/18/04;TOF ♥ repair 05/25/04)
Austin's sibs...Kristin(23), Jessica(20),Rebecca(17),
Rachel(12), Hunter(7) and Sarah(11).

Welcome and Congratulations! I found out my daughter Raeleigh had DS around 20 weeks. She is my world and I don't know what I did before I had her! I also wanted to say that I LOVE the name Clara!!!

_________________
Lora Leigh
Raeleigh-DS-7/14/05

Congratulations on your baby boy and welcome to the Downsyn Family!! We also received a prenatal diagnosis, and even at the age of 44, I was still shocked! I do remember how hard those first few months were. I wish I had an emotional remote control that could forward your emotional timetable to where you will find the sweet and calm love that has filled my heart in a way I never knew possible!! It was hard to have just a diagnosis without a sweet baby to hold, but for us, it allowed the time to grieve and get educated about Ds. So by the time AJ arrived, we were ready to be the family he deserved!

I look forward to learning more about you and your family. I am especially anxious to seeing your boy's sweet face!! Feel free to send me a pm if you ever want to chat! We are here for you and it really is going to be okay!

Ibby

_________________
http://www.onetruemedia.com/shared?p=26012b09b29bd00fe629cb&skin_id=0&utm_source=otm&utm_medium=text_url




Wife to Tim- 20 years. Mother to Maggie,18; Bridget,17; Kevin,15; Sean,13; Daniel,10; Catherine,8; Robert,7; Emily,5; Maria,3; Hope, 2, AJ (Ds) June 14, 2006

"How can there be too many children? That is like saying there are too many flowers." Blessed Mother Teresa

first congrats on you new baby boy. i have 2 boys and they are truely a great exprience.

second breath take things one day at a time.

we found out about eian's ds after he was born and had it confirmed at 6 weeks old. there are so many great programs out there that help kids with ds. my 2 month old already is doing Early intervention. one hr a week.

you will be ok i promise. we have all been there thats what we are here for.

_________________

Congratulations, and Welcome!
It doesn't matter when you get the news - it casts most of us adrift into uncharted waters. The unknown is a pretty big place.
You've got several advantages, though. You've got the experience of being a Mom already - you know all of the unexpected things that are gonna happen, regardless of what you've done. You've got time to prepare, mentally, for some of the different things you will face with this boy. Most of it will be in your heart and mind. And you've found us, already. I'm not bragging for myself, but this collection of folks can really help you through a lot. You may not have a lot to go through - and we really like brags and pictures, too.
Pollyanna, I'm not. I've had the darkest hours of my life since my Emma ( was born. They were dark because I didn't know. They were dark because I selfishly didn't trust. My Emma is the one that has taught me what it really means to be Human, to Love by doing AND being, and what courage and faith are. She lights up a room. She's a party girl. I didn't know.
Get the info, get ready, but don't let Trisomy 21 overshadow the day-to-day. Make plans. Buy a lotta diapers. Let us know how you're doing, good, bad, and in-between. One of the little-known benefits of our kids is that you've got thousands of friends you never had, before.
-Jeff

_________________
Nature goes her own way and all that to us seems an exception is really according to order.
-Goethe

Hi and WELCOME!

We have a good deal in common, you and I..
1) I have 2 girls, then a boy
2) I found out at 20 weeks that PJ has DS
3) I am sooo excited to finally have my boy
4) PJ has the white spot on his heart
5) I'm 42 years old.

Probably a bunch more if we decide to figure them out. PJ has a small hole in his heart that was not detected in utero, but is so small that the cardiologist believes it will either heal on its own, or if not, be so small as to not pose a problem.

He's now 3 months old, has doubled his birth weight and hollering for me right now. LOL.

you can find more info about him and us at www.myspace.com/katvirgo and also at www.katvirgo.blogspot.com

I look forward to getting to know you and your family. Congrats on one of the very best things ever to have happened to you. (I feel certain!)

_________________
Kathy, wife of Daniel since 2001, and mother of Danyse 22, Rebecca 11, and PJ (DS) 9/12/07
(seems I have a baby every 11 years)




[/url]

Hi Melissa and Welcome!! I was 41 when I had my son Shaun and refused all prenatal testings because they found nothing extra oridinary in my U/S. I had a very typical pregnancy so I was extremely floored when they told me they suspected DS with my son. Once one gets over the initial shock of it all the healing process does begin.

Glad your beginning to enjoy your pregnancy. This is a wonderful site and a great source of information. I find myself coming to the board before questioning the doctor at times. Welcome again!!

_________________
Dawn
Mom to Anthony 5/19/86 Elizabeth 10/5/88 Shaun 12/06/06 (DS)

Hello and welcome from a fellow NY-er! We're down by the NY/NJ/PA border. And they say it's going to be 45 here tomorrow -- wow, a heat wave!

_________________
Ecki



MomMom of Kayla (Ds/Autism 4/5/04) and Laurie (PDD-NOS 7/12/01)

Our Blog - Opposite Kids
Kayla's Story http://www.ecki.com/kayla/

First off, congrats on your baby boy! I envy your situation...I wish that I would have found out that my son had DS before he was born. I also think that you should try to enjoy the rest of your pregnancy. My son was born in May and also had no heart problems. Feel free to visit my blog (http://baetenfamily.blogspot.com) it you are curious about what we have been through so far. Especially my post "What I Wish" http://baetenfamily.blogspot.com/2007/12/what-i-wish.html

_________________
Melanie
Former teacher now stay at home mother
to Devin (2005) and Logan (2007 DS)

First off, congrats on your baby boy! I envy your situation...I wish that I would have found out that my son had DS before he was born. I also think that you should try to enjoy the rest of your pregnancy. My son was born in May and also had no heart problems. Feel free to visit my blog (http://baetenfamily.blogspot.com) it you are curious about what we have been through so far. Especially my post "What I Wish" http://baetenfamily.blogspot.com/2007/12/what-i-wish.html

_________________
Melanie
Former teacher now stay at home mother
to Devin (2005) and Logan (2007 DS)