I have been really stressing out over Asa's Daycare. Currently we are at a Children Center Daycare - state recognized etc. Asa will be moving up to the 3 year olds next week. He has been in the 2 year old room for over a year and his teacher is a little on the slack side, but his new teacher is really good but isn't there all day and the kids get dispersed when she leaves (depending on how many kids are still there - when the numbers dwindle she's the first to be cut). Our good friend has a in-home daycare and is awesome and does a lot of things with the kids - she has 3 other kids that she takes care of, all younger then Asa, but has 2 daughters that are 5 and 6 who would be there after school. She called me and has an opening!

My dilema - where would Ace benefit the most? All his therapists say the more 1 on 1 time the better. He would get that at our friends, he does to a certain point now, but I think a lot of times he gets lost in the shadows.

The center prides themselves on serious play - that being said everyday Asa is filthy! Monday when I picked him up it rained majority of the day but stopped around 3. They had the kids out on the playground when I got there at 5, Asa was sitting on the ground soaking wet! His butt was caked in mud and his shoes were drenched. To me it was silly to be outside if it was really that wet - a no brainer right? I posted a couple weeks ago about him eating rocks as well - this has stopped, but if he was really being watched he shouldn't of been putting them in his mouth in the 1st place!

A Pro to the Daycare Center is that our school district would contribute $45 a week toward preschool - they wouldn't for a in home daycare - which would be a savings because our friend is the same price as the center.

I'm just torn on where Asa is going to grow and learn the most. I know a lot of us are stay at home Moms, but I can't afford to do that and would love to be able to spend my days with my little man rather then just 4 hours after work and before he goes to bed...

What are other's thoughts? In Home or Daycare Center?

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"Life is What You Make it..."
www.henryfamily-lifeiswhatumakeit.blogspot.com

Jackie (34 yrs.) - wife to Brian (31 yrs.) and Momma to Asa (3 yrs.).

Based on all the things you have mentioned I would be sending him to the home daycare. To me the cost savings would not be worth it. I worked when my first two boys were little and did not like daycare centers because they seemed so cold and not very personal.

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Maureen - Mom to Daniel(21), Brandon(19), Jordan(13)PDD, Thomas(11), Carrie(7), Samuel(4) and Mark (2 - ds, av canal -repaired 6/10/08, pulmonary hypertension)
https://www.carepages.com/carepages/MarkEdwardC32708

We have had Jacey in an in-home day care (licensed by the state) since she was 12 weeks old and she has thrived there. Our older son also went there from the time he was one and now goes before and after school... When our son was little, I pulled him out of a center because of the inconsistency with teachers - he always had someone different in the afternoons because they also let his teacher go when her numbers dwindled. I know centers have "certified" teachers and such, but I've always felt more comfortable having my kids in an in-home day care. I do think they get more one on one attention there than they would in a center.

I would be absolutely livid if my child had been eating rocks or was soaking wet when I picked him/her up. To me, that alone is enough to warrant finding different placement. You have to take into consideration the $$, but $$ isn't everything. Just curious though, why would your school district pay for a center but not an in-home facility?? Is it because she isn't licensed?

I hope you find a suitable placment - I know when I was looking for a different place for my son, I was a basket case. It is so hard being away from our kids during the day and when you aren't happy with where they are or don't feel 100% comfortable with it, the stress is compounded all the more...

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Janet (44) and Jeff (44)
Joshua (angel) '85
Sarah-age 22
Jaret-age 5
Jacey-born 2/22/08 (dx w/ Ds 9/10/07)

Ahhh, thanks guys! Do you hear the stress releasing from my shoulders?

Janet to answer your question - the school district will only pay for 4 hours 2 days a week for "preschool". This is because the School District does not have it's own preschool program and is only willing to pay for a State Approved Daycare Center with a Certified Teacher - I know kind of ridiculous. My friend is in the process of getting licensed, but they won't pay for a in-home private daycare. We do go to the school 2 days a week for an hour each day for PT, OT, and Speech. It isn't about the money, even though it would help. I am all for what will be the best place for Ace. There are some issues with quality of care at the Center, mostly with certain teachers. Granted Asa can find dirt in a spotless room!

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"Life is What You Make it..."
www.henryfamily-lifeiswhatumakeit.blogspot.com

Jackie (34 yrs.) - wife to Brian (31 yrs.) and Momma to Asa (3 yrs.).

When I got pregnant with Elayna, I took a break from the corporate world and opened a home daycare which I ran for 5 years.

I took care of my Godson, my cousins children, a friends daughter and 1 or 2 others along with way. I was very lucky that I had the same children for years and watched them grow. I went back to corporate America 4 years ago so now the children are all alot older. But, we have a special bond, and even though my Godson just turned 9....I still get hug, kiss and he'll even sit on my lap when we visit. My girlfriends daughter is shy by nature...and she left me when she was only 2...but every time she sees me...I get a sweet hug and she remembers me and the loving care I provided.

However, on the flip side I can tell you over the 5 years I was licensed....the state came a total of 3 times (to renew my license each year and to check the house for safety). Other than that.....no visits to check up on me, no surprise visits to ensure things were going well. I always found that SO odd....granted, I took amazing care of the kids...but that's not the point...the state should have had more visits to ensure they knew what was going on. I post this to let you know, when you choose a home daycare, make sure you know your provider very well...because you can't rely on the state.

For financial reasons and for medical insurance reasons....I returned to work 4 years ago. At that time, my daughter was 4 and Daniel was just about 2. They went to a daycare center that was very integrated. We chose this place because they worked with all the agencies that provided services to kids with needs. We have loved it and never left. I chose the daycare center over the home because for me, I wanted my kids to to be able to stay with a consisent program, move up from class to class as they got older...and since they have a preschool and kindy....Daniel has been integrated right along with his peers from day 1.

Hope this helps, it can be such a tough decision.

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Lisa - Mommy to Elayna 10-1-02 and Daniel (Ds) 6-7-05
Always have hope....Without rain, there can be no rainbows.

Thanks Lisa - it helped - make my decision harder! LOL The in-home is a good friend who I totally trust. She's a hockey girl and wants to teach Asa how to skate this winter - she puts a rink in her backyard. I know she'd be great on helping out with potty training, this would never happen at the Center - too many kids and half the time when I pick him up his dipe hasn't been changed since after nap!

I'm still dilema-tated - he has grown so much since he started full time at the center (my mom watched him full time until last year then started 2 days at Daycare and 3 with my mom until July this year started full time at Daycare) His speech has progressed along with his interactive play, I mean he did play with my mom but how much fun is it playing trucks with a 64 year old? I just hate to make the wrong decision on where he'd be the happiest and learn the most.

BTW - we need to figure out a New England Meet-Up! I know there isn't that many of us but it would sure be fun!

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"Life is What You Make it..."
www.henryfamily-lifeiswhatumakeit.blogspot.com

Jackie (34 yrs.) - wife to Brian (31 yrs.) and Momma to Asa (3 yrs.).

Based on what you have said I would go for the in-home day care. Asa will have plenty of years at school down the track. It sounds to me that the in-home situation will give him more attention and be able to provide a great environment.

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Karyn
Mum to Nikki (Jul 89), Stefanie (Sep 96), Joel [June 98] and Talitha (DS) (Nov 05) AVSD/PDA repaired 23 March 06

"I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Marvelous are Your works, and that my soul knows very well." Psalm 139:14

Thanks all! I did break up with the Center this morning. Asa had more rocks in his dipe this morning and that just sealed the deal for me! Ugh, how hard is it to make sure he's not eating rocks! It tells me that they are really not watching the kids...

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"Life is What You Make it..."
www.henryfamily-lifeiswhatumakeit.blogspot.com

Jackie (34 yrs.) - wife to Brian (31 yrs.) and Momma to Asa (3 yrs.).

To help ease the decision you just recently made, we put our son Joey in an in-home daycare when he was 2. It was the best decision we could have ever made, she treats him like he is her own, she provides so much 1-1 time with him and he was around 5 other typical kids that he is still friendly with. We feel they also benefited from such a close relationship with Joey. When there is only 6, they really become close and learn from them (good and bad...LOL). Joey is now in 1st grade but he still takes the bus there after school and goes there when I have professional development days and even sometimes in the summer so I can go to Dr appts and what not!!! He LOVES getting his "CiCi" time! I don't think he would have got the "love" and attention he gets with her, in a center.

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~Melissa~ Mom to David (11) and Joey~Ds(6) and wife to Michael

To help ease the decision you just recently made, we put our son Joey in an in-home daycare when he was 2. It was the best decision we could have ever made, she treats him like he is her own, she provides so much 1-1 time with him and he was around 5 other typical kids that he is still friendly with. We feel they also benefited from such a close relationship with Joey. When there is only 6, they really become close and learn from them (good and bad...LOL). Joey is now in 1st grade but he still takes the bus there after school and goes there when I have professional development days and even sometimes in the summer so I can go to Dr appts and what not!!! He LOVES getting his "CiCi" time! I don't think he would have got the "love" and attention he gets with her, in a center.

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~Melissa~ Mom to David (11) and Joey~Ds(6) and wife to Michael

Why not skip the preschool and just do in home daycare with your friend. She has other kids that aren't his siblings therefore it will be like being in a small preschool class anyway.

I personally like places that aren't run like a business, since I don't feel children need to be treated like paycheques...I would go with your friend, because he will get love as a bonus...

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Mom to: Nicholas (May/02), Nathan (April/04), Charlene (June/06), Noah (DS) (May/07), Jesse Lynn (July/08 ), Tessa (Apr/10)